dark and dusty, painted on the sky ….

it never ceases to amaze me how a plan functions.
you spend days, weeks, months, even years, on a plan. a plan to accomplish whatever your hearts desire is..
I know some people that spend so much time on the plan that, by time it’s done, they will be too old, too grey, and too tired, to start.

me on the other hand, well, heh, i learned at a very early age that a plan is something you should have..
just so you know how it won’t happen.

I think the biggest plan i’ve ever had is my new site project i’m working on, and that isn’t anything more than

[my to do list]

*shrug* don’t get me wrong, i seriously love the feeling i get as i watch the electrons assemble themselves the way i ask them to, as my thoughts and ideas materialize into reality …

but i’m wondering when it’s going to be done. heh. i mean really, at this point, about half of it’s finished.
but in spite of long hours being spent on it, it’s been half done for 2 months now.

i suppose that *might* be because when i get tired of working on it i go and do research and in the course
of that research i find more things i want to do with it… 🙂

so my friend chris cougar_ml bought a new bike a few weeks ago.
same model as mine (kawasaki ex-250rr ninja) but 15 years newer.

i think, in a way, i’m jealous.. but not really. mine’s got 525,000 miles on the clock, and it’s still a fun machine.. and it’s not like i can’t afford to go buy a new one. i think it’s more the excitement of having passion for something. i see him ride it, and talk about it, and it occurs to me that i was young once. that and his is pretty (kawasaki racing green) and mine needs to be gone through and cleaned up and repainted *again*.

in some ways i feel the world has lost it’s sparkle and snap. but in other ways it’s all new and exiting. *shrug* i dunno.
i really need to regain my passion for life i think.
— end of line —

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2 comments to dark and dusty, painted on the sky ….

  • Oh, hon. You *Do* have a passion for life. You are just at that stage in your life where you are taking a better look at yourself, where you are & what you want. It’s natural. I looked at Fawn yesterday when she showed me her stained glass peice and saw her passion enfolding with creativity. I yearned to feel that again with making art. I, however am feeling a passion for life with other things. Writing again, Loving you, Sharing experiences together, the site & progress you have acheived on paganality. ALl of these things I have passion for & I think you have some too. 😉 I love you.

    ~R~

  • COUNT TO TEN AND PULL THE RIPCORD! AND JUST HANG IN THERE!!

    so you’re gettin old eh? >:)

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