search warrant!

08:48 am *bam**bam**bam* LAW ENFORCEMENT, SEARCH WARRANT!

i was in bed… slid down the ladder and headed for the back door…

walked into the kitchen (in my underwear)

and in through the back door of my house come 7 cops with their guns drawn.

so of course i dove face down on the floor with my arms out to my sides in the middle of my kitchen.

the first 6 go right over me, the 7th stops, handcuffs me, and watches over me while they go through the rest of the house.

then they start asking questions about anyone else in the residence, etc.

“not sure, but if there is there will be x person, named x, in location x, y person, named y, in location y, z person, named z, in location z, y and z may be at work and not in fact here”

so once the building was secured, they came back to talk to me. sat me in a chair and threw a blanket over me off the top of my dryer, and then they read me my rights and and asked me if i understood them.

“yeah”

then comes the fun part.

“whatchya guys lookin’ for, and can i help?”

apparently they had a search warrant to look for a marijuana grow operation.

i burst out laughing, couldn’t help it.

“okay, whats so funny?”

so then i explained.

1) i have a *huge* power bill. like 500 a month.

2) i have a big box next to my house that buzzes (18kva battery backup system, transformer is a bit noisy)

3) i have 10 full racks of computer servers in a room in my home that generate a ton of heat.

4) like 120,000 btu’s of heat / hour

5) i have a 9,000 cubic feet per minute fan in the floor of the data center that pulls air from under the house to keep that room cool. (this place lights up like a christmas tree on a thermal scanner).

by this time they took the cuffs off, and i showed them around.

anyone who’s never been here, my place is kinda amazing..
it’s stacked to the ceiling with a ton of computer equipment, thousands of blinky lights, etc, and cat 5 network cable run *everywhere*

so i’m showing them around, flirting with the female cop, and explaining what it is i do…

the officers are starting to get *really* embarrassed.

especially when the detective said “well you seemed to know what it was all about as soon as we came in, is their a reason you didn’t just call us and let us know that there would be suspicious activity (power bill, etc)”

“well, this exact same thing happened 4 years ago, i thought you would have taken notes then”

“what?!?!”

“yeah”

“aww hell”

all in all it wasn’t the best way to wake up in the morning, but the officers were very cool about the whole thing (not to mention embarrassed)

the team leader asked me if i would be willing to make a statement on tape for them, basically explaining the situation.

so i gave them a very very good statement. they were very professional, and they treated me with respect in spite of the warrant and suspicion and so on.

i made a special point about “when they didn’t understand what it was they were looking at, they didn’t touch it, but asked me”

that is *very* important here, as a whole lot of this stuff is very fragile and very expensive.

should be interesting to see what happens when the roommates get home, as they were all gone, and their stuff has been moved around a bit.

i’ve had a bunch of people ask me why i’m not bent out of shape and / or pissed off, etc.

well, a couple reasons.

first, the mistake was an easy one to make. every clue points right at it. i use more power than a building this size should, by about 20 times more.

secondly, they are a multi area task force. county, city, state, a big mix of officers… and they worked very well as a team, and they treated me very professionally under the circumstances. they didn’t let their egos get in their way.

and the biggest reason of all?
at this moment the team lead is talking to all of my neighbors explaining to them that they made a mistake, and that i’m innocent…

that takes guts.

they’ve got a rough job to do, and i’m not about to punish a good set of cops workin’ on bad intel.

their team lead has done over 200 raids like this one, and this is the first time they came up empty.

two of the officers with him were beat cops in this area… and they had no idea i ran an isp out of here, or anything about me.

that they are talking to my neighbors is above and beyond.

i for one am kinda glad there’s still good cops around.

stay safe guys.
— end of line —

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20 comments to search warrant!

  • Oh my goddess, I am soooo happy,
    1) you are okay, 2) it wasn’t a big deal, and 3) I wasn’t there.

    After the last big police adventure I had with you and the mustang, I don’t intend on having another. *smooches* Even though I love having fun adventures with you, luv.

    ~R~

  • DUDE!

    You may want to write a letter to the DEA or which ever law enforcement group did the raid. Start by giving praise to the officers, and finish by pointing out the incompetance of the intel for not crossreferencing. I could understand it happening once, but twice is just wrong.
    I hope your day goes better(Giggle)

  • It may not have been the best way for YOU to wake up, but reading this story was a great thing for me first thing in the morning. 😉

    Poor, poor Sylverstone. I have to say, though, I admire your attitude about it! I think that a lot of good cops get a bad rap because of a few very bad cops. I think that it’s great that you’re more amused than upset (and that they went to chat with your neighbors). However, I would like to second Chaneecat’s thought on: thank goodness I wasn’t there visiting you guys! After MY last run in with the Olympia cops, I don’t feel like I need to spend quality time with them any time soon.

    😛

    ~C

  • Um…so you didn’t tell them about the dead hooker in the bed? Whew….good…..um…nevermind.

  • And people say the lives of computer freaks are boring. Pfft! Show’s what they know. BTW hi Silverstone! *is a Lesley*

  • Yeah, well, you’re a suspicious-looking freaky kind a guy. I mean, the long hair, the motorcycle, all the medieval hardware….

    Are you sure there _isn’t_ a dead hooker under your bed? 😉

    ~Rose

    PS. As someone who shares a bedroom with Krenn and his network, I totally understand and also appreciate your attitude concerning the cops. It is one of the hardest and most thankless jobs in the world, up there with social work and school teaching, and the one slightly more likely to have people pull weapons on you. 😛

    • no, my data center is technically under my bed (i have a loft)

      The biggest thing to me is that they treated me with respect.
      good cops in my universe is fine. 🙂

      they even talked to the neighbors and told them it was a mistake..
      how cool is that?
      — end of line —

  • BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAH

    Life is truly never dull around you. To think I’ve managed to make it thru life with not more than getting pulled over for speeding.

    I don’t need to live life on the edge. I can enjoy it where I’m at, and be amused by your ever entertaining stories.

    Take care, and be well love.

  • Wow! That’s one hell of a way to wake up, for sure.
    I’m impressed with your attitude. 🙂 It’s refreshing.

    Best of luck with not getting raided again anytime soon.

  • Usually I prefer to be woken up with a nice kiss from my lady. At least you did have some clothing on, though 🙂

    Glad to see that it did end up turning out okay. This makes me wonder who left that knew what happened the previous time, or who didn’t talk with who to be able to know what happened last time.

    ~Oct’avian Silvermoon~

  • Oh….dear….god….*falls over laughing*

    I’m sorry that you had to put up with that, but thank you for sharing..that was the best way possible to start my monday!!

  • hahaha

    Well at least you don’t sleep in the nude dear. Heard from Ashling I should check out your story and you definitely beat mine for worst morning this week!

    Glad it turned out as just a funny story. On another note I really think it’s stand up that you mention the good done by the law enforcement even in your situation… I’ve yet to have a positive encounter with any of our local cops and hearing that their are good ones out their helps renue the faith. ^_~

  • while coming back from an sca-like event using boffer weapons, a friend was pulled over in west virgina. the cop detained the 2 occupants for a half an hour constantly asking the same questions over and over again, and injecting the question “are you taking the pot, boy?” into the line of questioning. they did thier best to explain why they were covered in mud, wearing chainmail, and carring camping equipment. then came the big question. “can we search your car, and do you have any weapons in there?” oh boy. try explaining what a boffer weapon is to a highway patrolman. they listed off the live-steel in the trunk, and tried to explain the boffer weapons. they gave the look of a kindergardener in a algebra class. so they pop the trunk and see the metric ton of foam maces, swords, shields, and other misc weaponry. the cop searching the trunk looks back at his partner with the look like a dog farted in his face. his all partner did was grin, choke back a laugh, and motion him on. the patrolman pokes the strange contraptions, picks up a couple, shakes his head in disbelief, and slams the trunk. the all supportive partner coughs to cover some much deserved laughter and allows the modern day knights to leave.

    he could have had a nuclear warhead in the trunk, and the cops would have laughed their way to the bomb shelter.

    just thought you might find that funny.

  • avatar Anonymous

    again…you are my hero

    Thank you again for pointing out that the police aren’t all graceless turds. And thank-you for being there for me this weekend – even if I didn’t take advantage of it (that chicken-shit thing came into play again; I’m much braver online when I can’t see facial expressions). I think I moved too quickly getting involved in the SCA again. It was too much this weekend. But, because I’m on Princess Ksenia’s retinue team, I have to go to Warren War. I hope to see you there. I will bring more mead 😀

    Love Olivia

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